Title: An Unattractive Vampire
Author: Jim McDoniel
Page Count: 309 [kindle edition]
Read Date: October 8, 2016-February 9, 2017
Description: Jim McDoniel’s debut novel, An Unattractive Vampire, is a darkly comic urban fantasy of ancient horrors in suburban cities. After three centuries trapped underground, thousand-year-old Yulric Bile—also known as the Curséd One, the Devil’s Apprentice, He Who Worships the Slumbering Horrors—awakens only to find that no one believes he is a vampire. Apparently he’s just too ugly—modern vampires, he soon discovers, are pretty, weak, and, most disturbing of all, good. Determined to reestablish his bloodstained reign, Yulric sets out to correct this disgusting turn of events or, at the very least, murder the person responsible. With the help of pert vampire-wannabe Amanda; Simon, the eight-year-old reincarnation of his greatest foe; and a cadre of ancient and ugly horrors, Yulric prepares to battle the glamorous undead. But who will win the right to determine, once and for all, what it truly means to be a vampire?
My Rating: 5 of 5 stars
My Review: This is one of the best things I’ve read in vampire verse. Take an ancient, powerful vampire and throw him into the modern era where vampires are weak and beautiful. Throw in his nemesis reincarnated into the body of sociopathic eight-year-old boy, and an older sister who is taking zero crap. Shenanigans ensue. It’s the battle of the ugly, ancient, and powerful versus the beautiful, famous, and not-so-bright.
While I did find the sister, Amanda, to be extraordinarily annoying, I found Simon, the boy nemesis to be very amusing. He kept Yulric–and basically everyone–on their toes. And I am totally on Yulric’s side, because vampires are not actors pretending to be human, pretending to be vampires, and they certainly do not sparkle…But we can keep the good looks, lol.
It’s a must read for fans of humor and vampires, and people who thought WTF?! after reading the sparkly vampire books.